Let me first say I love Medium, even though that mere statement alone won’t get this piece curated.

I really don’t care. It’s how I feel dammit.

I, like so many others, write on the Medium platform each day, and I like all the other writers on Medium understand just how hard a writer’s life really is. That’s why Medium has become so important to me.

I have a huge support group of like-minded folks who love to write just like I do. In addition, the fact I’m able to post at least once a day helps me continuously improve my writing, plus it keeps me from growing stale.

I really do love it you know.

My time spent reading and writing on Medium has become an integral part of me. I truly believe if I ever tried to walk away, the very act of not writing would probably drive me insane. When I stop to think about it, I’ve written almost as much on this platform as I have with my first 4 novels.

Each of the novels averaged about 90 thousand words (respectable size) so that’s in the neighborhood of 360 thousand words total.

4 X 90,000 = 360,000

I love easy math.

If you take the number of articles/stories/pieces I’ve written on Medium (most around 5, 6, and 7 minute reads) which is around 270, my word count is hovering right at ~315 thousand words.

Not too shabby if I do say so myself.

But just as important, I get to read a lot.

Reading so many thought provoking articles from each of you is a pure delight. The same goes for being able to share my thoughts, my stories, my feelings and yes even my frustrations. It’s what keeps me from curling up in a fetal position in the evenings.

Which brings me to the crux of my issue (not an issue) (yes, it’s an issue) and a few humble opinions.

I’m going to just throw it out here okay?

If Curation Gods Really Exist Tell Them I’m An Atheist

That’s right, I’m coming out of the closet on this. I’m admitting to everyone I don’t believe Curation Gods exist. Just because many of you have testified about the wondrous power of the Curation Gods doesn’t make it real for me.

I, the King Kong doubting Thomas, the Madeline Murray O’hare of the Medium world do not believe Curation Gods Exist.

At least on the planet where I live and write.

Look, my ego isn’t half what it used to be several hundreds of years ago when I started receiving my first rejection letters. Back then, my shit stank.

Some of it really bad.

But you have to plant that writing seed in some really foul smelling crap to get it to grow. You have to nurture your writing, care for it, trim the weeds and pour on some more shit if you want it to thrive.

And I have.

I’ll admit, even now, some of the pieces I write are total losers, but there have also been a few which gained a lot of traction. I’ve read comments from readers who spoke of how the articles inspired them. How my thoughts came at just the right time for them. I’ve counted the unusually high number of reads and fans. I saw proof it wasn’t just me who thought the article was pretty damned good.

Readers were saying it as well.

If the Curation Gods really existed — to which a lot of you testify they do — these articles should have been curated. But they weren’t.

None of them have been.

Which leads me to believe the Gods of Curation don’t exist. They’re a figment of imagination, a myth perpetrated by the Medium back office, a Griffin which exists only by virtue of the spoken or written word.

And as such I’ve become an atheist.

I just do not believe.

You ask if I don’t believe in Curation why am I still writing?

You’re kidding me right? Do you folks actually think the only reason I write is because I hope one day to be curated?

Let me think about that for a minute, uh, nope.

As I said earlier in this piece if I wasn’t writing I’d be a drooling hot mess (can dudes be a hot mess?) curled up in a corner talking to myself…and answering myself.

I have to write. I have to.

Just because I’m an atheist when it comes to the Curation Gods doesn’t mean I won’t continue to write. I’m mean come on, Madeline Murray O’hare didn’t believe in God, but she continued to enjoy the wonders our supreme deity provided each day until she was murdered.

Gulp, maybe I should reconsider using her as a comparison?

Okay, Madeline notwithstanding, I’m going to keep pounding the keys and posting stories; letting my thoughts rip every day like clockwork.

And speaking of clockwork.

I’m a little anal in case some of you haven’t noticed. I set my articles to publish every day at 07:30 AM Central Time. Check your watches then look for my articles. A new one comes out each day.

Was that a blatant plug for you folks to read and clap for my stuff?

I’m sorry Medium Curation Gods, I’m so…

Wait, I don’t believe in the Curation Gods, so why the hell am I apologizing?

Yeah, you folks keep telling me the Curation Gods exist and I don’t know, maybe they do. For now, I just ain’t buying it. But who knows, maybe one day I’ll finally have that epiphany. You know, like when God struck Saul down on the road to Damascus? Saul was a big time hit man for the High Priests. He had a hand in eliminating a lot of Christians in his time, until God blinded his happy ass for three straight days.

Soon afterward, Saul became Paul and a believer.

Maybe it’ll be like that for me if the Curation Gods really do exist.

But I’m thinking maybe not.

Even if it never happens (hasn’t happened so far) I’m going to keep on traveling the road to Damascus, writing my stories and telling my tales.

Hell, my name is already Paul so what’s the worse that could happen?

Let’s keep in touch: paul@pgbarnett.com